Pretty Little Liars Season Premier!

Oh lord what I can I say about Pretty Little Liars. This is one of the most dramatic shows on TV these days and that is saying something. This is what....the 3rd season? Why does ABC Family have such short seasons? Anyway, we started be recapping the final episode of last season where Ian, the girls' primary suspect for Ali's murders mysteriously disappears after he tried to kill Spencer. Spencer is still "a person of interest" in Ali's murder and her mother the lawyer is doing everything she can to keep the cops off the scent. Also on a side note, these girls drink more coffee than anyone I've ever seen, including me!

We also have a return of the scrumptious Noel Kahn & Mona is just as obnoxious and crazy as ever. It really amazes me how much time Aria and Ezra spend one-on-one at school of all places. The other students and faculty must think she is either the dumbest or the most gifted student at that school to get so much personal attention from teacher.

 Isn't it funny how Spencer's parents won't let Toby in their house because "he is bad" but then Toby's parents won't let Spencer into their house because "she is bad". Emily is her typical angsty self and nearly jumps out of her skin when the Realtor walks into her house and proceeds to give her mom the cold shoulder. How is it that all of these girls have perfect waves at all times? There is never a bad hair day in Rosewood unless its Toby. I feel bad for Spencer and how she is treated by her family. She is like the prodigal son who never actually did anything bad.

I feel like this show never moves forward...all they do is rehash the past. Probably because the show hinges on the anonymity of "A" and once his/her identity is revealed, goodbye plot. The grief counseling scene is yet another way for these girls to relive the past "where they weren't always this close." Now Caleb is coming back to Hannah, hello past. Mona is the hag of all hags. Who died and made her the new Queen Bee? Oh right, Ali did.......

Melissa is being nice to Spencer again and now she is gabbing about baby names. She clearly wants something and I don't know what it is but she is going to such a crazy place! Also, Aria, how could you be Ezra's "rebound girl?" You are like twelve!

Quote of the episode: "You know what I love about Saturdays? The feeling I get when I look up and realize we have the whole day to spend together." -Ezra Fitz

Emily, if the therapist "has to keep your secret" then what good is it to tell her all of your secrets? What advice can she possibly give to you without going to the police?

Why would A steal Ezra's diploma and plant it in the therapists's office? Would a therapist really recommend that a group of friends separate when they are helping each other cope with tragedy? There are so many inconsistencies in this episode it's not even funny. And to top it all off we have the now trite "Jar of Hearts" by Christina Perri....and a horrible cut to boot.

The episode (finally) ends with Spencer running ass over her house from a shadow.....that turns out to be Toby. If he wasn't a creeper, then why would he be running around her house in the dark. Then she receives a text from "Ian" that says "its not safe I can't tell you". We come to the conclusion that Ian is alive because he responds to the text that they are naming the baby Taylor. And to top it all off, the recurring character in the black leather gloves visits Emily's open house and either downloads or deletes something to her computer.

Was anything in this episode new? No. Did we get any further toward solving the case of Alison & A? No. Why do I still watch this show? It's so tacky that I can't get enough!